I was around seven months pregnant with my first child when one of my favorite coworkers came barging into my office with a concerned and exhausted look on her face. Ready to lend a listening ear and helping hand, I turned from my desk carefully holding my baby bump. When she saw it, she smiled and immediately forgot what was bothering her. Then she blurted out ever so abruptly (as was her style), “Are you going to breastfeed that precious baby?” Up until that moment, I had not really thought about what I would feed my baby. Between my job and being a full-time graduate student, I didn’t have time to think about a lot of things. I told her I wasn’t sure. She pulled up a chair and began to tell me all about breastfeeding. Her narrative of breastfeeding painted a beautiful illustration of a strong, courageous woman making a selfless act valor. She described an almost magical bond between mother and child. At the end of our conversation she urged me to consider breastfeeding.
After that conversation, I began consuming myself in books and scientific studies on breastfeeding. From the beginning of this endeavor, it was clear to me that feeding was superior to formula. Breast milk provides optimum nutrition to babies for healthy growth and brain development. It contains important antibodies that boosts immunity to protect babies against infectious diseases. Breastfed babies have lower rates of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS), lower post neonatal infant mortality rates, and lower risks of diabetes and obesity later in life. Some studies have even linked breastfeeding to intelligence, finding that children who were breastfed scored a slightly higher IQ. The benefits don’t stop there. Breastfeeding can also be more cost friendly. For mothers, breastfeeding offers both physical and emotional benefits. Breastfeeding promotes faster postpartum weight loss, stimulates the uterus to return to normal size, reduces the risk of anemia, urinary tract infections, and postpartum depression, and produces oxytocin and prolactin to promote stress reduction and positive moods. Despite all of these benefits, only 58.3% of U.S. mothers breastfeed through six months and only 25.6% exclusively breastfeed through six months. I was quite distrubed by the alarming statistics and the fact that none of my family or friends had even attempted to broach the subject with me. Honestly, it scared me. I thought that there must be something pretty awful about breastfeeding that causes most mothers to opt out. Through my own personal experience of breastfeeding and countless stories shared by other breastfeeding mothers, I’ve learned that among the many difficulties to be confronted and barriers to overcome, inadequate support is the most detrimental to breastfeeding initiation and continuation.
What is the importance of breastfeeding support?
Breastfeeding is hard work. In fact, many mothers equate breastfeeding to a full-time job. Whether you are exclusively breastfeeding or breastfeeding with a supplement, you spend countless hours nursing your baby day and night. If you live in a country like the United States where breastfeeding is commonly frowned upon, you’ll often find yourself feeling alienated at times when you need support the most. At family functions, restaurants, trips to the mall, or attending church, I found myself tip toeing away to find a quiet hidden corner to nurse my baby. And then there are the naysayers; the family members and friends who question your decision to breastfeed. Those who seem offended because you aren’t using formula or giving your baby a bottle yet. You hear the stories about how breastfeeding wreaks havoc on your breast: “You’ll have saggy boobs before you’re 30!” The daunting questions and comments, “How do you know he’s getting enough to eat?”, “How long are you going to breastfeed?”, “Doesn’t that hurt?”, and “You’re spoiling that baby!” You’re exhausted and trying to do what you think is best for your baby. You remind yourself that they only mean well and try not to be offended or discouraged. Then there are the many women who have challenges with producing enough milk, a baby who struggles to latch, or other unique physical characteristics that create challenges with breastfeeding. After you feel like you’ve finally figured it out, it’s time to return to work. The struggle of juggling work and pumping every two to four hours feels like you’ve been set back ten steps. I’ve met women who were too afraid to tell their boss they needed time to pump or to ask for adequate workplace accommodations. Women often feel that their coworkers are judging them or complaining when they disappear throughout the day to pump. I pumped in my car in a parking garage when I returned to work and it was humiliating and uncomfortable. It felt like punishment. Returning to work is one of the top reason’s women discontinue breastfeeding. All of these barriers that women face when they decide to breastfeed can be solved by one simple thing: support.
What is breastfeeding support and who can give it?
Breastfeeding support is any act or service that promotes breastfeeding. Everyone plays an important role in breastfeeding support: fathers, partners, family members, friends, support groups, healthcare providers, employers, colleagues, and even strangers in public spaces. At a very basic level, everyone can support breastfeeding mothers by normalizing an innate practice that has somehow become taboo in many parts of the developed world. If you see a mother breastfeeding her baby in public, accept it as a regular or typical way that women feed their babies. Create a safe and supportive environment by simply being kind and accommodating. Whether a mother is nursing uncovered or more discreetly, her goal isn’t to “expose” herself or to “lure” anyone. She’s simply taking care of her baby. Chances are, you are making her just as uncomfortable as you may feel. Support from family and friends is absolutely critical to breastfeeding success. Family and friends should be encouraging and available to listen, learn, and offer help. If breastfeeding is uncharted territory for your family and friends, tell them what you need to feel supported. Bottle-feeding is often a way for fathers, partners, and grandparents to bond with the new baby. Mothers who want to exclusively breastfeed often feel pressured to pump or introduce a bottle prematurely. Supportive families should understand that there are many different ways to bond with a new baby that doesn’t involve feeding. For example, cuddling, changing, walking, reading, or bathing the baby. Healthcare providers play an important role in support too. They shouldn’t assume that they know what a mother will choose to do. Rather, they should educate mothers about breastfeeding, allow mothers to make their own informed decision, and then support that decision by being prepared with effective and accessible resources. Employers can support breastfeeding mothers by providing a dedicated, clean, comfortable, and private lactation room and having an open dialogue about how to make the return-to-work transition easier.
When do you need support and how do you get it?
Establishing breastfeeding early on is key to long-term success. This means that the best time to organize your breastfeeding support system is before you have your baby. A great starting point is equipping yourself with knowledge about breastfeeding. Have open conversations with your partner and healthcare providers about your decision to breastfeed and what you think support will look like for you. Develop a small group of friends or family members that breastfed as your support circle. Breastfeeding support groups are a great source of information and support, especially if you can’t find support amongst family and friends. Breastfeeding support groups come in all shapes and sizes. There are online support groups and groups that physically meet in your local community. Another free source of support is your local WIC clinic which offers breastfeeding peer counseling, a buddy program, and support groups. Doulas are a great resource for breastfeeding moms too. Doulas are trained companions who specialize in non-medical, personalized maternal care. They provide informational, practical, and emotional support and advocacy for mothers during pregnancy, childbirth, and postpartum. Doulas, breastfeeding peer counselors, support groups, family members, and friends can offer a lot of helpful advice, tips and tricks, emotional support, and encouragement. If you need simple guidance on topics like how often to breastfeed, breastfeeding positions, product recommendations, and common issues that are easily addressed within the home, these are all great sources of support. More complicated challenges may require the help of an international board certified lactation consultant (IBCLC). Professional lactation consultants are healthcare professionals that specialize in the clinical management of breastfeeding and lactation.
If you are a new or expecting mother thinking about breastfeeding, let me encourage you first by saying “you can do it!” Make the commitment before the baby arrives, set up your support system, and make sure they know how important this is to you. You can start with the list of resources below.
-Joy Toliver